The Wage Gap is Widening and Honestly? I'm Not Surprised.

You’ve probably seen news that the wage gap between men and women is widening. And if you’re a woman…well, you’re probably not surprised. I know I’m not. 

When I welcomed my twins, I left a full-time job in favor of freelancing. The move gave me so much flexibility, additional time with my family, and autonomy over my schedule. I got to be both a stay-at-home mom and a working mom. 

People tell me that I have the best of both worlds, but they don't acknowledge the tradeoff: I make significantly less than I would at a full-time job, for example. But that's the thing about being a woman, and especially mother: There is always a trade-off, and often that trade-off comes at the expense of money. Now, with return-to-office mandates, of course this is going to become more of an issue. 

As we finally confronted during the pandemic, women do disproportionate amounts of domestic labor and caregiving (not just for their kids, but for parents and community members as well). We don't always have the opportunity to go for every promotion, to take every work trip, to log every late night at the office, because we have other responsibilities...and because doing everything is a recipe for burnout.

It's a vicious cycle: The wage gap has always existed, not just because female-dominated fields tend to underpay, but also because women are paid less than men for the same jobs. 

And so, in many families (my own included!), it makes sense for the woman to scale back her career to make it all work; that career isn’t the one sustaining the family’s lifestyle.

Because of this, women often take the more flexible jobs, or the jobs with fewer hours, or the jobs that are closer to home…and they’re willing to settle for less money because they can’t afford not to. The cycle persists. Because they take on more work out of office, they can’t show up at work every day with their batteries fully charged.

I’m no economist; I don’t know how we solve this on a national level. But I do know that something needs to give. And I need my fellow women who are facing this to know: It’s not your fault. You aren’t failing. You are being failed. 

Ask Clara: Why do women make less money? 

Katie Thurston is the Breast Cancer and Women's Health Advocate We've Been Needing

While we've certainly all heard that breast cancer cases are rising among younger women, it can be really easy to fall into that trap of feeling like breast cancer in young women is still so rare, it can't possibly happen to you. But earlier this year, at just 34 years old, Katie Thurston was diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer. And in detailing her journey, she’s become a new kind of advocate for early detection and awareness.

The reality is, it can be hard to conceptualize the risk of breast cancer at a young age when all you see are stats and headlines. But when you see a real woman in your age range going through it? That puts things into perspective in a whole new way. 

Thurston has become something of a public face for the disease, especially as it affects younger women...but she's all become the friend who is going through it and sharing her experience in the most authentic, human-to-human way. 

On Instagram, Thurston has created the "boobie broadcast", which is essentially a group chat in which she details what it actually looks like to live with breast cancer. She opens up about treatment options, appointment frequency, symptoms, and the emotional impact of all of it.

She's giving us a look behind the curtain. And while we so wish she didn't have to endure this, she is undoubtedly going to help other women gather the courage to get screened, to pay attention to changes in their breasts, to seek out answers, and to make sense of their treatment options.

Even for women under 40 — and, contrary to what many people think, even those without a family history of the disease — the risk of breast cancer is real. That's why voices like Thurston's are so important. When you see a woman who feels like the embodiment of someone who is "too young" and "too healthy" and "too relatable" to be diagnosed with breast cancer, you start to see it as an issue that could affect you too. And that gets you to take your risk seriously, and to take charge of your own health. That's life-saving…and Thurston’s role in this? It’s heroic.

Ask Clara: Why is breast cancer rising among young women?

Dylan Sprouse is Spreading Endometriosis Awareness, and You Know What? Hell Yeah

Victoria's Secret model Barbara Palvin recently opened up about her experience with endometriosis. Like many women, Palvin suffered for years before learning what's been going on in her body. And by sharing her experience, Palvin is using the most powerful advocacy tools women have at their disposal. 

And now, her husband Dylan Sprouse is doing his part for the cause as well.

It's a powerful reminder that while women have done incredible things to drive awareness around the conditions that affect our bodies, allies can only help us drive awareness and move the needle. And that's what Sprouse is: An ally. 

The actor wore a yellow ribbon on his lapel and carried additional ribbons to hand out when supporting his wife at the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. "I brought this endometriosis awareness pin. Do you want one? Because Barbara just went through endo surgery and I'm handing these out tonight just to raise some awareness tonight," he said.

Awareness around women's health issues is so important, and endometriosis is one of those issues that we particularly need to be talking about more. It can take women up to 7-10 years to be diagnosed with endometriosis: That's years of debilitating, unnecessary pain, years of feeling unheard and seeking out answers and solutions, years of wondering what's normal and what isn't. 

It all starts with awareness. When we have a broader cultural awareness of this issue, women and girls can begin to identify their symptoms, rely on community support, and start advocating for themselves in medical settings. 

Sprouse doing his part to drive awareness matters. Not just because we need to be talking about issues like endometriosis more, but also because it speaks volumes when men talk about the realities of women’s bodies. So many of the problems we have in the world of women’s health stem from the reality of how we regard female bodies. We treat them like objects, like they only matter for the way they look and not how women feel in their bodies. But by talking about the realities of how women’s bodies function, Sprouse is chipping away at some of that. Sprouse opted to do this at the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show, an event that has been criticized for objectifying women’s bodies and only highlighting a specific body type. But by using his time at the event to draw attention to a real women’s health issue, he flipped the script.

We couldn’t applaud this sweet couple more for using their fame and platforms to spread awareness about the cause. One thing is clear: We need people — men and women — talking about endo. 

Ask Clara: Why does endometriosis take so long to be diagnosed? 

'The Parent Trap' Actresses Just Wrote a Love Letter to Female Friendship on 'Dancing With the Stars'

We'll say it until we're blue in the face: Female friendships are essential. Not just because our friends make us laugh and make us feel seen and give us a soft place to land, but also because investing in friendship is good for our health. 

That's why we are so obsessed with what The Parent Trap actresses Elaine Hendrix and Lisa Ann Walter — who are still real-life best friends nearly 30 years after filming the iconic movie — just did.

The TL;DR? Hendrix (who played the most stylish villain of all time, Meredith Blake) is competing on this season of Dancing With the Stars. Last week, the show had "dedication night", and each contestant chose an important figure in their life to honor. While many honored parents, children, spouses (you know, what we think of when we traditionally think of as "family"), Hendrix chose to honor her best friend, Walter. 

“We have both starred in many movies, had husbands and boyfriends. They come and go. We are constant,” said Walter. “And we’re going to grow old together.”

“This moment is a celebration of Lisa and I, and of female friendships everywhere,” added Hendrix.

In our world of "frenemy" storylines, pitting women against one another, and prioritizing romantic love stories over platonic love stories, it can be easy to lose sight of how vital and good and important female friendships are. We have to thank these incredible besties for reminding us.

Ask Clara: What are the benefits of female friendship?

SNL Just Brought Humor to Perimenopause

Ah, perimenopause and menopause — those things we rarely ever even talked about, yet are finally having their rightful moment of public attention. And you know what? We have to laugh through the mood swings and hot flashes.

Saturday Night Live just brought some much-needed humor with a skit about a mom going through "a phase" — a phase that could last years. Delightful!

In the skit, which you can watch here, two teenage children and their dad can be seen sitting around the dinner table, wondering where their mom is. They're discussing her as if she's a teenager, wondering why she's out again and talking about all the phases she's been through.

When the mom returns, she very much gives ~angsty teenager vibes~ (while wearing a very emo getup). The kids acknowledge this is a weird time for their mom before giving her a book titled When a Period Becomes a Comma: A Guide to Perimenopause. The mom also has a (hilariously relatable) meltdown. "Try living one day in my twisted reality! Raising two kids and taking care of my aging parents! Life is a nightmare. Vision blurry, nerve pinched, pelvic floor on the ground," she yells.

Yup, felt.

If you're a millennial who is approaching mid-life, chances are you're navigating some of this: Caring for aging parents while raising kids (ah, the sandwich generation!), while also dealing with your own body's changes. It's a lot. And we have to hand it to SNL for giving the women who are currently living through this "phase" some representation (albeit in a funny, dramatized way of course!)

Ask Clara: Why am I so moody during perimenopause?

Jennifer Aniston is Speaking Out (Again) About Invasive Pregnancy Speculation

Jennifer Aniston is, once again, speaking out against the incredibly offensive, invasive pregnancy speculation she faced for years. And it's just another reminder that we need to knock it all the way off with the pregnancy speculation. Because it's not just in incredibly poor taste — it can also be so painful for its victims.

If you're over a certain age, you remember this: Aniston's status as a highly successful woman in Hollywood who (gasp) did not have children (or, as some put it "refused to give her [then-]husband children") was a constant source of public conversation. Many decided that Aniston was prioritizing her career over motherhood, and they didn't hold back on spewing their disdain for that perceived choice. 

Years later, Aniston revealed that the public had it all wrong. She had been going through IVF. As someone who knows how incredibly painful infertility is, I can't even imagine what Aniston was going through...or how much the awful public chatter added to her burden.

“They didn’t know my story, or what I’d been going through over the past 20 years to try to pursue a family, because I don’t go out there and tell them my medical woes,” Aniston told Harper's Bazaar during a recent interview. “That’s not anybody’s business. But there comes a point when you can’t not hear it, the narrative about how I won’t have a baby, won’t have a family, because I’m selfish, a workaholic. It does affect me – I’m just a human being. We’re all human beings."

Aniston’s reason for opening up about this once again? To stand up for other women who are going through it — not just the desperation of infertility, but also the navigation of a world that views women’s bodies and reproductive choices as fair game for constant scrutiny, speculation, and commentary.

Ask Clara: What is pregnancy speculation?

The Ilona Maher Barbie is Here, and the Reviews are Mixed

Our queen Ilona Maher, the body-positive, wildly athletic, hysterically funny, successful role model we've been needing can add one more line item to her resume: Barbie inspiration.

Mattel just released a version of the iconic doll to resemble Maher, and that's something we've been needing. Maher is a famously body-positive athlete (who could forget the time she went viral for rightfully pointing out that BMI is a flawed health metric?).

According to a post announcing this release, Mattel created an all-new body sculpt to make this doll. They made the prototypical "Barbie body shape" (which has been rightfully called out as highly unrealistic) more representative of an athlete's body shape, including defined muscles, a sculpted core, and an altered torso shape. ?

I love this, particularly as the mom of a Barbie-loving little girl. 

But some people have been critical. "This Barbie is NOT built like a rugby athlete," one person commented on the Instagram post announcing the doll. Why did yall make her skinny? Where is her MUSCLE? This is disrespectful," another added.

And listen...the people have a point. This is progress, though. And I can't wait to get my hands on this doll for my own little Barbie fan in fall of 2026.

Ask Clara: What is body positivity? 

What is 'Eldest Daughter Syndrome?'

The term "eldest daughter" is everywhere right now. It’s even the name of a song on Taylor Swift's most recent album.

Eldest daughters are, well, exactly what they sound like: Women who happen to be first-borns. They also happen to be emotional stewards for many people in their lives, from their own siblings, to all the people they encounter and care for as they move through life. And, according to the conversation, many eldest daughters are suffering from a thing called "eldest daughter syndrome", which leaves them exhausted and emotionally depleted. 

But is this syndrome a real thing or (yet another) social media-made myth? 

"Eldest daughter syndrome isn’t a formal medical or psychological diagnosis," says cognitive behavioral psychologist Terri Bacow, PhD,. "It’s more of a cultural or social term. It refers to the tendency for first-born daughters in many families to take on outsized responsibility, both practically and emotionally, compared to their siblings.  As adults, they may end up with certain traits such as anxiety, perfectionism and difficulty asking for help.  Many grow up to be ultra competent or leaders in their fields but struggle to set boundaries because so much was expected of them as a child."

According to the expert, there are elements of truth here, but the phenomenon of eldest daughter syndrome has been overblown by social media (shocking, right?).

“Psychological research regarding  birth order does show that the eldest sibling receives the greatest amount of attention [and] also the greatest amount of pressure,” says Bacow.

TL;DR? Eldest daughters may carry this pressure throughout their lives — but being an eldest daughter doesn’t necessarily mean you or your lived experience will line up with the “eldest daughter” stereotype that has ballooned thanks to social media.

Ask Clara: What is the mental load?

Michelle Williams, Busy Philipps and I Agree: We Need to Bring Back Zumba

As a deeply unathletic person, I always thought exercise was just never going to be my thing. And then I discovered dance workout classes.

Zumba in particular always felt like the most fun, inclusive way to work out. When I was in my dance class era, it was often me and a bunch of 60-something ladies. They’d have the absolute time of their lives, shaking their hips and waving their arms and whooping up a storm as they cheered for each other.

But somewhere along the line I forgot about Zumba, and the rest of the world seemed to as well.

Here to revive the trend? Busy Philipps and Michelle Williams, Dawson’s Creek co-stars and real-life besties. Philipps is doing a partnership with Zumba, and she’s speaking out about how she got into the dance workout. "I had done Zumba years ago, actually because of Michelle Williams…and I loved it,” she tells People.

I love this so much. Not just because it cenetrs exercise as an enjoyable movement, not as punishment. But also because I love a multitasking moment, and doing a workout class with a friend is the perfect way to reap the benefits of both movement and friendship (which is actually really good for your health — so take this as your sign to schedule that girls’ trip).

Like Philipps, the treadmill is “just not for me”, and I spend the warmer months mostly walking outside as exercise. But now it's cooling down? I’m about to go locate a Zumba class near me — and you should too because exercise can be fun! And no, you don’t need to be a good dancer. You just need to be willing to have fun and try a new form of movement, one that’s more about the party vibes and less about punishment. 

Ask Clara: What are the benefits of dancing?

WTF is a 'Functional Freeze'?

Have you ever felt like, even though you know you have so much to do, you simply can't get yourself to...do it? Like, you can see the dishes piled up in sink, you can read the to-do list, you can list all of the work obligations you have due in the next few days (or even hours) in your head...yet you simply can't make yourself do any of it? 

If so, you may be someone who experiences "functional freezes", which may leave you questioning whether you're just "lazy" or "unproductive" or if there's something larger at work. 

Okay, but let's back it up a bit: What is a functional freeze? The term is taking off on TikTok, where creators talk about feeling stuck or frozen, often describing it as a stress response.

It makes sense, at least to me: Often when I have too much on my plate, I feel like I don't even know how to begin clearing it, which just leaves me feeling almost paralyzed with overwhelm. But is this a legitimate term?

Not clinically, but experts are validating the idea of the "functional freeze". In a TikTok on the subject, psychologist Sarah Hensley, Ph.D., explains what's going on in this state. Essentially, when your nervous system jumps into fight or flight mode...but when you're able to shut off that mode, it's like a "light switch comes off". 

But what happens from there is a vicious cycle: You feel shame for finding yourself in that freeze mode, which only disregulates your nervous system even more. 

So what's the fix? In another clip, the expert recommends listening to music you haven't heard in a while.

For me, breaking up what I need to do into smaller, digestible pieces helps a lot. For example, instead of going right to "I need to clean the house", I'll start with something like "I need to clean the dishes off the table", then move on to the next micro-task (like: "I need to put all the items on the counter away". But, if your functional freeze seems to be affecting your life in larger ways, a chat with a licensed mental health professional might be in order.